“It was one of those March days when the sun shines hot and the windblows cold: when it is summer in the light, and winter in the shade.” -Charles Dickens
Yes, it is true; spring has finally arriven. It's been a long time since sun has shone this vividly and strong. It's a sight to see, to be honest, and it's going to be like this at least for the rest of the week. I just wish I hadn't had so much school work (I'm literally knee-deep in it and I'm still behind) so I could enjoy these sunny days a bit more, spending them with my friends in a park, just chilling. Though this fantasy will surely become reality during summer, I just can't wait for it any longer. Although the weather is kind and warm, summer seems billion years ahead, yet I still know these spring months will pass by quickly as well during so much school work time will practically fly by. I wish this tough period of time would just go by as quickly as possible, because I cannot stand any day longer in that hell called school.
Maybe I am wrong, for saying this. This might mean I'll never pass those exams, because I won't be doing them with passion and joy in my heart. But what other choice do I have? If I'm constantly surrounded by people saying me I should go for what I want, go follow my heart, how am I supposed to and expected to also do all of this at the same time? Right the other day our physics teacher was telling us about passion and how if you're following your heart and your dreams, you'll never fail. It was very ironic the whole time, since physics is one of the two subjects I'm not very good at. It's a whole lot bigger burden for me than anyone could imagine. Probably some of my peers might, but otherwise I don't think a lot of people can identify with this sort of statement. For only a few know by this age what they truly want in life. I'm not saying I'm 100% sure myself, but I know exactly what I do not want to do in life. Rather, what I do not wish to waste it with. And school is sadly one of those things. Sure, I'll graduate from this high-school tall and proud and with good grades, because I'll just have to work my ass off like everybody else did. I'm not willing to be a wimp and pity myself if I'm not perfect in all subjects. Yet it is hard, combining it all together once you've (even if only partly) already decided in the least what you want to do with your life. That all of this bollocks will do you no good, maybe in some sort of scientific interview with some brainy Asian who will always conquer you. Let's be honest; we all have very slight chances (if you're not from the States) of actually succeeding. I know the statistics. And they're not in the foreigner's benefit. Maybe it's tough, but I crave adventure outside this shit dump. Somewhere beyond my comfortable zone, where, as they say, life begins. And I'm full of that. Full of love for life somewhere else, with new people, new adventures, even new freaking clothes. Just starting off somewhere far away, where nobody knows you.
Now, I think it's time to get optimistically-realistic. It's my own state of mind I've created for myself; it's similar to daydreaming, only that you actually have a plan for making it real. That's possibly a good way to start off your "new" life, or so-called, the "dreamy" one. The one that's probably never even going to happen, but one can dream. I think the absolutely necessary part of being successful in something, is that you love that 'something'. That you're doing it with optimal burning passion and desire to achieve more. For only that way you'll actually make something of yourself. An ambition person, to start with. And that always comes handy. Now the absolutely necessary second part of being a successful and also happy and content person, is to free your mind (as you probably already noticed on the picture). It's not only a tumblr-optimistic mainstream bullshit; it's actually worth keeping in mind (who would've thought, right?!). It's something you must possess to have a relaxing everyday so you can achieve as much as you can on your future professional area.
Times get hard and you find yourself in a sticky, inevitable situation you can't run away that simple from. You have to face it. Everybody goes through that, go Google it and you'll see what I'm talking about. Anyway, it's absolutely acceptable and normal to feel out of place or off the track. Just think; do you even imagine how many people might feel just the same as you do? Just as lost and hopeless and worthless as you may feel from time to time? Let that be in your consolation, because in this time of need and anguish we have to help each other out by compassion. By understanding each other and listening to each other. If you ask someone for help, that doesn't make you a weak person. On the contrary; it makes you an ambitious person who knows what it takes to be on the top. The best among the best.
I don't really know what's the point of filling you up with this crap, to be honest. I just felt like writing it down of how trapped I feel within myself and my presence. I'm tired of my existence and my goddamn face. I just want to teleport somewhere nice and quiet, somewhere I can find truce and peace with my mind. This whole stupid reality feels like I'm caged in a mix of confused emotions running around me and I can't seem to decide which one to pick. Or maybe choices flying above me. Every other seems too important to miss it, so I can't focus on what truly matters. But I know what really matters, and I know it inside my heart. But then again; what does a 16-year-old know about having passion about something? Desperately wanting to be somewhere else, creating something she might not understand? So many prejudices are present that I constantly think there's nothing gonna come out of it anyway. But that's wrong. That's where most people are wrong. Because we have to only follow our heart. Yeah, that sounds great. But actually doing it? Not that simple.
And why? I love it when Johnny Depp said adults treat teenagers like their stupid. I agree with him, because that's the sad truth and no one seems to be doing anything about it. Sure, they say the future hangs upon us, we are the only good left on the planet. But is that really so? Is that truly what people think? Of course not. Please, if you thought so, stop blinding yourself. World's not a romantic comedy. Maybe an ironic comedy, but that's the only fun there's to it. At least when it comes to the harsh truth. Otherwise life contains so many beautiful wonders and life itself is so full of magical inspiration, so how come we can't see it? We are forever surrounded by some sort of negative crap going around us. At least when the talk goes about making your dream become a reality. Sure, everybody says 'be yourself.' But the moment they see it's not what it was expected of you, it's wrong. They're gonna judge you anyway, so screw them and anyone else who thinks you're not worth of your own dreams. The great Walt Disney said: "If you can dream it, you can do it." How real that is. More than any of us can imagine, until it's sadly too late. Well, they do, however say, it's better late than never. But how late is it allowed? Because at some point, you don't see it's somehow worthy anymore. You saw your life pass you by, not doing what you truly wanted from young age. That's what's wrong. Unhappy people. Society pushing you to the very edge of its intolerance. And we poorly indulge and give in to fate. That's our pathetic excuse.
Thought I can see it why some people do it. Because they really don't either stand a chance or don't even have the circumstances to have a slightest chance to have a chance. But there are also a special kind of people who have a special place reserved in my heart. Those are who are simply and plainly lucky. Yet those have to exist as well, as sadly as it may seem, even though as dear Sherlock Holmes would put it: "The universe is rarely so lazy." But I also have a juicy, most useful advice in store for you. Just let it go. Just go your own way, notice only your own progress and your own heart and head, because once you turn left or right, see others on their path to success, you're doomed. You start doubting yourself instantly, and that's completely ordinary. It's just like, forbidden. You must never allow yourself to be so shallow to envy someone else. Let them be your prey and your challenge, your inspiration to reach higher. Don't see them as competition, that comes later. For now, see them as someone you can learn something from. Something useful, indeed. Because once you achieve that, you're invincible. You're unbeatable and you're strengthen like you've never before. It's all due to insanely strong mind game. It's all in the head.
Enough with the hard part. Life is too short to not notice how strangely beautiful it is, in its own unique and wonderful way. It fucks you over very often, but gives you so much joy on the other hand as well. You must let that joy overcome your everyday, because it is the emotion you have to give a chance. The emotion you have to let in your life, to let it glow and bring light in your life. Everything's more wonderful if you look at it with bright, cheerful eyes and wide smile upon your face, arms spread widely, willing to accept any challenge given. That's the source to all the magic happening to the "happy" people. They're not really that happy or oddly and annoyingly optimistic or just born with it. They chose to accept the good and most important part of life that is beautiful. That should always be embraced first and foremost.
(C) Every artwork used is from Tumblr
Maybe I am wrong, for saying this. This might mean I'll never pass those exams, because I won't be doing them with passion and joy in my heart. But what other choice do I have? If I'm constantly surrounded by people saying me I should go for what I want, go follow my heart, how am I supposed to and expected to also do all of this at the same time? Right the other day our physics teacher was telling us about passion and how if you're following your heart and your dreams, you'll never fail. It was very ironic the whole time, since physics is one of the two subjects I'm not very good at. It's a whole lot bigger burden for me than anyone could imagine. Probably some of my peers might, but otherwise I don't think a lot of people can identify with this sort of statement. For only a few know by this age what they truly want in life. I'm not saying I'm 100% sure myself, but I know exactly what I do not want to do in life. Rather, what I do not wish to waste it with. And school is sadly one of those things. Sure, I'll graduate from this high-school tall and proud and with good grades, because I'll just have to work my ass off like everybody else did. I'm not willing to be a wimp and pity myself if I'm not perfect in all subjects. Yet it is hard, combining it all together once you've (even if only partly) already decided in the least what you want to do with your life. That all of this bollocks will do you no good, maybe in some sort of scientific interview with some brainy Asian who will always conquer you. Let's be honest; we all have very slight chances (if you're not from the States) of actually succeeding. I know the statistics. And they're not in the foreigner's benefit. Maybe it's tough, but I crave adventure outside this shit dump. Somewhere beyond my comfortable zone, where, as they say, life begins. And I'm full of that. Full of love for life somewhere else, with new people, new adventures, even new freaking clothes. Just starting off somewhere far away, where nobody knows you.
Now, I think it's time to get optimistically-realistic. It's my own state of mind I've created for myself; it's similar to daydreaming, only that you actually have a plan for making it real. That's possibly a good way to start off your "new" life, or so-called, the "dreamy" one. The one that's probably never even going to happen, but one can dream. I think the absolutely necessary part of being successful in something, is that you love that 'something'. That you're doing it with optimal burning passion and desire to achieve more. For only that way you'll actually make something of yourself. An ambition person, to start with. And that always comes handy. Now the absolutely necessary second part of being a successful and also happy and content person, is to free your mind (as you probably already noticed on the picture). It's not only a tumblr-optimistic mainstream bullshit; it's actually worth keeping in mind (who would've thought, right?!). It's something you must possess to have a relaxing everyday so you can achieve as much as you can on your future professional area.Times get hard and you find yourself in a sticky, inevitable situation you can't run away that simple from. You have to face it. Everybody goes through that, go Google it and you'll see what I'm talking about. Anyway, it's absolutely acceptable and normal to feel out of place or off the track. Just think; do you even imagine how many people might feel just the same as you do? Just as lost and hopeless and worthless as you may feel from time to time? Let that be in your consolation, because in this time of need and anguish we have to help each other out by compassion. By understanding each other and listening to each other. If you ask someone for help, that doesn't make you a weak person. On the contrary; it makes you an ambitious person who knows what it takes to be on the top. The best among the best.
I don't really know what's the point of filling you up with this crap, to be honest. I just felt like writing it down of how trapped I feel within myself and my presence. I'm tired of my existence and my goddamn face. I just want to teleport somewhere nice and quiet, somewhere I can find truce and peace with my mind. This whole stupid reality feels like I'm caged in a mix of confused emotions running around me and I can't seem to decide which one to pick. Or maybe choices flying above me. Every other seems too important to miss it, so I can't focus on what truly matters. But I know what really matters, and I know it inside my heart. But then again; what does a 16-year-old know about having passion about something? Desperately wanting to be somewhere else, creating something she might not understand? So many prejudices are present that I constantly think there's nothing gonna come out of it anyway. But that's wrong. That's where most people are wrong. Because we have to only follow our heart. Yeah, that sounds great. But actually doing it? Not that simple.
And why? I love it when Johnny Depp said adults treat teenagers like their stupid. I agree with him, because that's the sad truth and no one seems to be doing anything about it. Sure, they say the future hangs upon us, we are the only good left on the planet. But is that really so? Is that truly what people think? Of course not. Please, if you thought so, stop blinding yourself. World's not a romantic comedy. Maybe an ironic comedy, but that's the only fun there's to it. At least when it comes to the harsh truth. Otherwise life contains so many beautiful wonders and life itself is so full of magical inspiration, so how come we can't see it? We are forever surrounded by some sort of negative crap going around us. At least when the talk goes about making your dream become a reality. Sure, everybody says 'be yourself.' But the moment they see it's not what it was expected of you, it's wrong. They're gonna judge you anyway, so screw them and anyone else who thinks you're not worth of your own dreams. The great Walt Disney said: "If you can dream it, you can do it." How real that is. More than any of us can imagine, until it's sadly too late. Well, they do, however say, it's better late than never. But how late is it allowed? Because at some point, you don't see it's somehow worthy anymore. You saw your life pass you by, not doing what you truly wanted from young age. That's what's wrong. Unhappy people. Society pushing you to the very edge of its intolerance. And we poorly indulge and give in to fate. That's our pathetic excuse.
Thought I can see it why some people do it. Because they really don't either stand a chance or don't even have the circumstances to have a slightest chance to have a chance. But there are also a special kind of people who have a special place reserved in my heart. Those are who are simply and plainly lucky. Yet those have to exist as well, as sadly as it may seem, even though as dear Sherlock Holmes would put it: "The universe is rarely so lazy." But I also have a juicy, most useful advice in store for you. Just let it go. Just go your own way, notice only your own progress and your own heart and head, because once you turn left or right, see others on their path to success, you're doomed. You start doubting yourself instantly, and that's completely ordinary. It's just like, forbidden. You must never allow yourself to be so shallow to envy someone else. Let them be your prey and your challenge, your inspiration to reach higher. Don't see them as competition, that comes later. For now, see them as someone you can learn something from. Something useful, indeed. Because once you achieve that, you're invincible. You're unbeatable and you're strengthen like you've never before. It's all due to insanely strong mind game. It's all in the head.Enough with the hard part. Life is too short to not notice how strangely beautiful it is, in its own unique and wonderful way. It fucks you over very often, but gives you so much joy on the other hand as well. You must let that joy overcome your everyday, because it is the emotion you have to give a chance. The emotion you have to let in your life, to let it glow and bring light in your life. Everything's more wonderful if you look at it with bright, cheerful eyes and wide smile upon your face, arms spread widely, willing to accept any challenge given. That's the source to all the magic happening to the "happy" people. They're not really that happy or oddly and annoyingly optimistic or just born with it. They chose to accept the good and most important part of life that is beautiful. That should always be embraced first and foremost.
(C) Every artwork used is from Tumblr
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