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Sweet December

 December. Month of love, happiness, care and forgivness. And most important: time to make your last, unfinished wishes and golds come true. Although the world will end in 19 days. I don't believe in it, do you? I mean, some people really overreact when they bought underground homes for like at least one million dollars and spent all their belongings. I don't know, I just think we shouldn't be so naive and believe everything we see on TV or read in newspaper.

 Anyway, December is so magical to me. Just all the lights, Christmas spirit everywhere, the smell of mulled wine and hot chocolate and just joy in every corner you look, it overwhelmes me. And plus; I think there's no real December without snow. In Slovenia last year, it was so empty and sad without snow. It wasn't real Christmas. Now it's snowing and it must have reached over 10cm. I hope days now will be cold enough so the snow won't melt right away.
 I just love December. I haven't actually before, but now I find it so magical, lovely, peaceful, joyful, cheerful and awesome. Also, it would be lovely and nice to have someone to cuddle with on these cold days... Someone to cherr you up, to warm you up. To just sneak in their sweet embrace and stay there until winter sun caress your cheeks and then you softly wake up and realise you're safe. Because you're with them, in their arms that won't let go even in the coldest weather. That will protect you and keep you from harm no matter what.
Oh well, here I go again, dreaming of the impossible. I can't keep my thoughts from thinking this way. It just flowes and I suddenly have no influence on anything anymore. I guess I'm going crazy, for having no one.
 Sometimes I wish I'd be someone else. Who doesn't? I wish I could see myself in a different perspective. Again, who doesn't? And here I go daydreaming again, how would it be. But then I wake up and realise I'm still me. No one. Trapped inside my room, typing my feelings here, on some blog, having no one that'd be just mine. All mine. I laugh at school, from my soul. I feel happy because I'm surrounded only by the people I trust and care about. But when I get home... I crack. I can't handle it. Then I pick myself up again, in hope, that eventually all the good stuff will come. All the things I should deserve to have. That one day, karma's going to be on my side.

 So here I am now, in my room, being sick. Listening to Debussy's Claire De Lune, drinking hot tea and looking out of my window. I see trees, all white from snow and the city, also all white and silent. I find it so beautiful. It's like a winter fairytale. Everything's quiet from where I look. A few birds fly pass from time to time, but nothing else. Still, all I see is our small city trapped in a white carpet. And in the distance I can notice the cute, little hills also covered in a snow blanket. It's kind of scary though; the fog everywhere and silence. But is nice. It's beautiful. How nice would it be to have someone. The city seems so sad and lonely. In spite of all people living in it. Whatever they're doing. Now it's December and we should all think about good stuff. How and who we're going to spend the holidays with, what should we give our loving ones. Sure something from heart. Even if it's a small gift, make sure it's from your heart. They're chersih it even more. And most importantly: love your family. No matter how many times you've fight, how many things you've said to each other. This is the month of love and forgivness and I personally think it couldn't be at more perfect time. It brings whole family together. Again. And again, every year. No matter where you are through the year. Christmas is that one holiday that connects you with your family. And if you have any unsettled things between any of your loved ones, forgive and forget. Seriously, there's nothing more stupid than waste time for some resentment. The world's better when you're less grumpy and more loving, caring and kind. It'll turn your relationship with your family quickly on better. And remember that they will always stand by you and love you.

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